Being sick is soooooooo lame. Especially seeing as I'm finally getting better...just when I start to get better, I get drunk and smash my head on a table. Not a normal kind of "bonk", but a full on SMASH. People on the other side of the room heard the sound...it actually kinda of pushed me backwards. So I have a minor concussion...and fighting a cold.
Also, if you don't like the way I live my life, go away. You know who you are.
The job interview on Tuesday went sooooooo good. I'm pretty amped on it. I find out if I get it tomorrow, so fingers crossed! I miss working!
In other AMAZING news...GOING TO QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE!!!!! Should be such an awesome time. I'm so stoked!
Really that's it. I leave you with the BRAND NEW The Academy Is... video for "Neighbours"...it's so amazing and makes me smile like a little school girl.
Always Love
Shayna
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Dilemma?
What to do? I want to be upfront about it, but I can't seem to bring myself to actually do it. I think we both get nervous and don't want to say what we want to say...so we stay quiet.
In the roar of the crowd, we stay silent.
In the roar of the crowd, we stay silent.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
RETREAT, RETREAT!!!
Ok, so after doing some spring cleaning on the old blog, I'm finally satisfied! Got rid of everything I didn't want anymore...everything during my "icky time", as Jenn calls it. I'm pretty stoked that for the most part I came out unscathed. No more hurt, back to my old happy self. I learned my lesson!
So the boys were in town last night, which ALWAYS spells trouble. I got kidnapped and forced to drink a large amount of tequila...ok, I wasn't really "forced" per say...more like Tim hinted at drinking tequila and I agreed strongly.
Needless to say, it was a fun night. Tim started singing Hilary Duff and I punched him in the sack...FUNNY! The night essentially ended with me in bed with Tim and Scotty...nothing dirty...Scouts honor ;).
Worked on some lyrics. I've got to be honest though, everything is a little more angry than I had originally figured they would be, but I guess when you've been as fucked up as me, you don't really have much more of an option. Things aren't always going to be rainbows and butterflies.
I'm happy to be back to where I should be. I mean, I'm 19 years old. Life is all about fun, being with your friends, and not being tied down to anything. Which is EXACTLY what I intend on doing right now!
On a totally unrelated note, seriously, if you aren't going to make the effort to see/talk to me, fuck you. I was really underwhelmed with a lot of people when I got my surgery done 2 weeks ago. Not a phone call, text message, nothing. It really sucks, honestly. People that I barely knew were calling me to see how I was doing. I'm just over it, honestly. I've got my few handfulls of AMAZING people in my life, I don't need anyone bringing me down for no obvious reason.
ANYWAYS, off to see a boy about breaking a 7 month issue.
Always love!
Shayna
So the boys were in town last night, which ALWAYS spells trouble. I got kidnapped and forced to drink a large amount of tequila...ok, I wasn't really "forced" per say...more like Tim hinted at drinking tequila and I agreed strongly.
Needless to say, it was a fun night. Tim started singing Hilary Duff and I punched him in the sack...FUNNY! The night essentially ended with me in bed with Tim and Scotty...nothing dirty...Scouts honor ;).
Worked on some lyrics. I've got to be honest though, everything is a little more angry than I had originally figured they would be, but I guess when you've been as fucked up as me, you don't really have much more of an option. Things aren't always going to be rainbows and butterflies.
I'm happy to be back to where I should be. I mean, I'm 19 years old. Life is all about fun, being with your friends, and not being tied down to anything. Which is EXACTLY what I intend on doing right now!
On a totally unrelated note, seriously, if you aren't going to make the effort to see/talk to me, fuck you. I was really underwhelmed with a lot of people when I got my surgery done 2 weeks ago. Not a phone call, text message, nothing. It really sucks, honestly. People that I barely knew were calling me to see how I was doing. I'm just over it, honestly. I've got my few handfulls of AMAZING people in my life, I don't need anyone bringing me down for no obvious reason.
ANYWAYS, off to see a boy about breaking a 7 month issue.
Always love!
Shayna
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
So I have this habit of getting drunk...
I shake my head at my actions last night.
Besides singing seriously for once. I'm proud of that.
I will NEVER consume as much booze in my life, ever again.
Note to self: stop telling people about "talents"...it just makes them want demonstrations.
Besides singing seriously for once. I'm proud of that.
I will NEVER consume as much booze in my life, ever again.
Note to self: stop telling people about "talents"...it just makes them want demonstrations.
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Frick.
Alright, so I've been doing a pretty fair amount of writing as of lately. That's going amazing. Finally opening up and reading my lyrics to those closest to me is scary, but I've been doing it. I still have a ways to go and tons more things to write about, but I'll get to where I need to be soon.
Surgery is finally happening on Tuesday. It's really terrifying. I know that everyone is telling me that it'll be alright, and I know that they believe that...however, they aren't the ones that are getting it done. It's scary. Instead of being told "the doctor's know what they're doing", it would be nice to hear "I know, it's scary, but I know you'll be alright".
The past few days have been super weird. Just getting a weird vibe from everyone. It seems like because the sun went away, people got angry and bitter.
But on the other hand, I've been doubting myself a lot and in a weird mood, so it very well could just be me. I've been doubting things with boys, things with family, things with who I see in the mirror.
I feel like I'm not up to par with everyone else. Like I'm not on the same level (whether it be higher or lower, still haven't made up my mind). I feel like Nanaimo has somehow corrupted my confidence. I have never questioned myself with people and I find that I am.
I just see myself changing, becoming who I want to be. It's really nerve wracking. Taking those steps out of your secure cocoon...it's overwhelming.
Putting yourself out there for someone you barely know, that's terrifying...
But life is about risks, no?
Surgery is finally happening on Tuesday. It's really terrifying. I know that everyone is telling me that it'll be alright, and I know that they believe that...however, they aren't the ones that are getting it done. It's scary. Instead of being told "the doctor's know what they're doing", it would be nice to hear "I know, it's scary, but I know you'll be alright".
The past few days have been super weird. Just getting a weird vibe from everyone. It seems like because the sun went away, people got angry and bitter.
But on the other hand, I've been doubting myself a lot and in a weird mood, so it very well could just be me. I've been doubting things with boys, things with family, things with who I see in the mirror.
I feel like I'm not up to par with everyone else. Like I'm not on the same level (whether it be higher or lower, still haven't made up my mind). I feel like Nanaimo has somehow corrupted my confidence. I have never questioned myself with people and I find that I am.
I just see myself changing, becoming who I want to be. It's really nerve wracking. Taking those steps out of your secure cocoon...it's overwhelming.
Putting yourself out there for someone you barely know, that's terrifying...
But life is about risks, no?
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Classifieds- The Academy Is... (shocked?)
My life reads like the classifieds.
Pages of what's for sale; what's on the auction block.
Attention bidders! It's Lot 45.
He's got a decent voice, he's got that crooked smile.
Hold on, you haven't heard the best yet.
He writes good storylines, he's got those honest eyes.
So take him home for just $9.95.
He'll sing the songs you like, he'll keep you warm at night.
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart.
I'm not the type to forget about nights like this,
when every single move that I make is documented and scored for style points.
The once ambitious one now holds the smoking gun.
And if I die in my sleep, are you still willing to be everything you promised you would be?
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart.
Will you be the first one to tell the neighborhood paper
and all my family and friends that still care?
Did you buy what I sold and did you feel what I told you?
I hope that you still do.
Will you promise yourself, that this isn't all we've got?
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart
So while listening to this song tonight, I started crying. A lot. It reminds me of Justin and my relationship. Plus William Beckett's voice is just too beautiful.
<3
My life reads like the classifieds.
Pages of what's for sale; what's on the auction block.
Attention bidders! It's Lot 45.
He's got a decent voice, he's got that crooked smile.
Hold on, you haven't heard the best yet.
He writes good storylines, he's got those honest eyes.
So take him home for just $9.95.
He'll sing the songs you like, he'll keep you warm at night.
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart.
I'm not the type to forget about nights like this,
when every single move that I make is documented and scored for style points.
The once ambitious one now holds the smoking gun.
And if I die in my sleep, are you still willing to be everything you promised you would be?
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart.
Will you be the first one to tell the neighborhood paper
and all my family and friends that still care?
Did you buy what I sold and did you feel what I told you?
I hope that you still do.
Will you promise yourself, that this isn't all we've got?
Back down, cash out, that's the city for ya.
Break down and back out, and get what's coming to you.
When you said you were falling apart
I thought you meant that you were falling apart
So while listening to this song tonight, I started crying. A lot. It reminds me of Justin and my relationship. Plus William Beckett's voice is just too beautiful.
<3
Monday, June 4, 2007
Won't Go Home Without You- Maroon 5
I asked her to stay
But she wouldn't listen
She left before I had the chance to say
Words that would mend
Things that were broken
But now it's far too late, she's gone away
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?
Hard to believe that,
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
The taste of her breath, I'll never get over
The noises that she made kept me awake
The weight of the things that remain unspoken
Built up so much it crushed us everyday
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?
Hard to believe that,
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
Of all the things I've felt but never really showed
Perhaps the worst is that I ever let you go
I should not have ever let you go...
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I love this song. I really do. It's obvious to those who know me well enough why.
That is all.
<3
But she wouldn't listen
She left before I had the chance to say
Words that would mend
Things that were broken
But now it's far too late, she's gone away
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?
Hard to believe that,
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
The taste of her breath, I'll never get over
The noises that she made kept me awake
The weight of the things that remain unspoken
Built up so much it crushed us everyday
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?
Hard to believe that,
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
Of all the things I've felt but never really showed
Perhaps the worst is that I ever let you go
I should not have ever let you go...
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I won't go home without you
I love this song. I really do. It's obvious to those who know me well enough why.
That is all.
<3
Sunday, June 3, 2007
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